A common misunderstanding is that if two perfect people meet, the relationship will last no matter what. But even if your relationship seems great, it can end if you keep doing things that hurt it.

In the end, our habits are what make or break our partnerships. But there are some habits that really stand out and are what we call “relationship killers.”

If you look at the numbers, these relationship killers may seem like normal things to do. But it’s probably best not to take habits as normal, because normal doesn’t always work. That being said, here are 5 habits that people have in their relationships that hurt them.

1. Treating your partner badly.
The Gottman Institute, which was started by John Gottman and his wife after decades of studying love, says that disrespect is the main thing that ends relationships.

When one partner constantly insults or puts down their partner, that’s an example of contempt. They might use passive-aggressive language or say other things that make you think they hate their partner.

2. Refusing to work on yourself and grow.
I’m sorry if you think you’re easy to deal with; everyone has problems. When things get tough, it can be hard to work things out if you keep putting the blame on your partner and refuse to see your part in the relationship.

3. Dishonesty.
Being dishonest hurts relationships. Sometimes it’s possible to get past a lie, but when someone lies all the time, making it hard to tell the difference between fact and fiction, they will lose trust. If trust is broken, it will take time to fix if it can be done at all.

4. Lack of trust.
Trust is an important part of partnerships. Without it, partners can become so obsessed with each other that they push each other away, which can become really unhealthy.

5. Lack of support.
There should be two people in a relationship who work together to support and push each other to reach their goals. There are many reasons why one or both partners can’t do that. This is a bad sign that things will end badly.